It Could Be Worse: Saddest. Lineup. Move. Ever.


Last night was an easy night to be a Tigers fan because GOOD GOD DID YOU SEE THAT CABRERA HOME RUN AND THEN THAT OTHER CABRERA HOME RUN MVPMVPMVPMVPMVP. But we should never take success for granted. Especially because Justin Verlander is going tonight and that likely means the Tigers will score negative runs.

So for today’s “It could be worse” I tried finding the exact opposite of last night’s Tigers. It’s not hard to find that in the 2003 Tigers, who on this day nine years ago lost to the Minnesota Twins 6-2.

Games behind in the division: 46.5 (I literally laughed out loud when I saw this.)

Starting lineup:

1. Ben Petrick, CF (PH Alex Sanchez)
2. Shane Halter, 3B
3. Bobby Higginson, RF
4. Dimitri Young, DH
5. Craig Monroe, LF
6. Carlos Pena, 1B
7. Brandon Inge, C
8. Warren Morris, 2B
9. Ramon Santiago, SS (PH Danny Klassen, Kevin Witt)
P Jeremy Bonderman

Not a single hitter in this lineup was hitting over .300. Three…THREE…of them were hitting below .220 while one more player was hitting .221. I would never claim to be able to pitch against a Major League lineup, but if there was a group of nine players I wouldn’t be scared to face off against, it would be this group.

Not surprisingly the Tigers were never in this game, falling behind 5-0 by the fourth inning. This would be the Tigers’ seventh straight loss. My favorite moment from the game is the following play-by-play:

"Juan Rincon replaces Jesse Orosco pitching Danny Klassen pinch hits for Ramon Santiago (SS) batting 9th Kevin Witt pinch hits for Danny Klassen batting 9th"

I’m sure if you looked hard enough, you could find a sadder series of events, but I don’t believe it’s possible. I

"I imagine the moment went like this:Trammel: “Danny, you’re up!”Trammel: *thinks to self* No, wait. I have someone better. *Looks at bench *Trammel: “Kevin, get you’re helmet. You’re up instead. Show us what you can do!”*Witt strikes out on three pitches *"

Finally, these were the pitchers Trammel used out of the bullpen: Jamie Walker, Chris Spurling, Matt Anderson, Franklyn German and Fernando Rodney. If there is a hell, it’s seeing that parade of relievers every night for eternity.

So tonight, while you watch Verlander make batters swing and miss while his teammates make the opposing pitcher look like Verlander, just remember. It could be worse.