Ranking the best mustaches on the Detroit Tigers

The Detroit Tigers have several players donning a mustache

We've spent a lot of time here at Motor City Bengals talking about serious topics revolving the Detroit Tigers. Considering the state of the team, that can get quite tiresome. So today, we're going to try something a bit more off the wall and fun.

The Detroit Tigers have several players on the team who have a mustache. Some of them look better than others. Depending on who you ask, none of them look all that appealing.

Nobody quite knows what inspires players—or people in general—to grow a mustache. It's one of those things that people don't like to talk about. But again, some look better than others.

The majority of the players on the Tigers that have a mustache are relief pitchers, so maybe it's a bullpen thing. Relievers are a pretty tight knit group of people since they are around each other so much. That being said, there are a couple position players on this team that have mustaches.

Enough stalling. It's time to rank the mustaches on the Detroit Tigers.

Honorable mention: RHP Garrett Hill

Hill gets an honorable mention since he's not on the active roster at the moment. He was sent down to Triple-A last month, but he's still on the 40-man roster, so we figured we'd give him a shoutout.

Hill looks like he's just started growing his out, so it's a little hard to judge it as it stands. A few others on the team have had theirs much longer so they are much bushier.

Personally, I think Hill looked better without the mustache, but I'm not going to say he should go out and shave it or anything. To properly rate his mustache, we need to see it grow out a bit more.

4. OF Riley Greene

Riley Greene was clean shaven when the Tigers drafted him in 2019, and stayed that way in summer camp in 2020. 2021 was more of the same. Last year, he started growing a beard, and it looked pretty solid.

But recently, he shaved his beard and kept the facial hair above his lip, which obviously gave him a mustache. He was asked about it by a few beat reporters last week, to which he replied, "don't worry about it."

Maybe Greene thinks the stache will help him break out of his early-season slump. He has gotten off to a slow start, rolling a ton of balls over and striking out a ton. It could be a superstition thing for him.

But I have to admit...it looks pretty corny on him. It just doesn't look natural for him. Other guys are just able to pull it off. Greene? He's just not that guy.

Riley Greene is a good looking dude. I'm not sure why he'd want to ruin his complexion with a mustache like that. He ranks fourth in our Tigers player mustache rankings.

3. RHP Jason Foley

Foley has developed into one of the best arms in the Tigers bullpen. His power sinker gets up to 98 mph and is near impossible to hit in the air.

While his performance on the mound has been rightfully making headlines, his facial hair isn't quite worthy of such praise. It's better than Riley Greene's mustache, but that's not saying a whole lot.

It's definitely bushy when compared to the first two mustaches we talked about, and it has a better shape as well. But frankly, we should be talking more about the hair on his head than the hair on his face. That's a top five hairdo on the team if I do say so myself.

Foley's mustache is just average. His 'stache ranks third on our list.

1. C Jake Rogers

Who else was going to take the top spot? Jake Rogers has had this mustache since 2021, and it has only gotten better with age.

The main thing that puts Rogers' mustache on top is that's a full-on horseshoe 'stache. Its had time to grow and mature. Plus, now Rogers has shaved the rest of his face, so we can focus solely on that beautiful specimen.

That's just it. It's a glorious mustache. There's really nothing else to say. Jake Rogers has the best mustache on the team.

There are some other great mustaches in baseball. Atlanta's Spencer Strider, Yankees' Nestor Cortes Jr., and former Tiger Andrew Chafin immdiately come to mind. But Jake Rogers' mustache takes the cake for the Detroit Tigers.